Just
yesterday, many people are saddened when the news about the 17-year-old SPM
candidate committed suicide broke out. When I first come across the news
article, there’s just one question in my mind: “Why?”
I can’t stop but just try to figure out
why and what could have gone through his mind that makes him end his life. Is
it really because of the difficult questions from the Additional Mathematics or
are there some other reasons that we will never understand?
To be honest, whenever I see news about
students committing suicide, I understand why they will make such a move and at
the same time I do not understand why. I understand that it is because of circumstances
that forced them into one dark corner and the only solution they could think of
to end all this is to end their life. The thing that I do not understand is, why
choose suicide as the problem solver?
Please do not get me wrong, I am not
trying to blame or disrespect anyone. What I want to say is if you are having a
hard time in life, suicide is not the ONLY solution, my friends. Even though
you are having a hard time, trust me, it will not last long. Instead of saying that
I overcame the challenges that I face, I will just say that I looked into the
bright side of life. In another words, I avoided them. Obviously avoiding is
not a good solution as well. It is the last resort and the easy way out. I always
believe that challenges are part of life. It is what makes life interesting.
Don’t you think so?
I have to admit, I am not a smart or
hardworking student at school. Even though my parents ‘begged’ me to study, I
will just nod and get away with it with a scolding later on. I am a stubborn
person and ignorant, in a way. I bring my phone to school every day since Form
2. I even got the guts to skip class almost every day since Form 4 to hang out quietly
in one corner in the school compound. You must be thinking: “Aiya, you’re
enjoying life, of course you won’t have much challenges that some students out
there face la.”
Do you really think that people that
go against the rules does not have any stress? Come on, everyone have their own
sets of challenges that other people will not understand because you are not in
their shoes. In fact, you can NEVER be in their shoes. Think about it, if you
have met me for just one year, do you think you will be able to understand my
whole life and how I felt in my 19 years of life just because you walked the path
with me for one whole year? No. Do not forget that everyone is born with their
own sets of feelings as well. You can never COMPLETELY understand how a person
feel at all times.
Let me tell you my challenges from
the stupid things I had done. Yes, it is stupid and I regret it now. I could
have done so much better in my studies but well, thanks to puberty, I made my
life much more interesting. I always have this good girl image in front of my
parent’s eyes, in order to not hurt them because of my own actions, I have to
always make up stories or always be alert of my surroundings every time I do
something bad. You will not understand the stress that can come from your
parent’s questions like: “So how’s tuition/school today?” It is stressful
because every time they ask questions like this, I will be thinking if they had
found out that I lied to them. Then, thinking how to reply in an
I-did-not-do-nothing-wrong manner is not easy, for me. Moral of the story, do
not lie. To keep up to all your lies is not easy and what is so good about
that? A quote from Mark Twain says it all: “If you tell the truth, you don’t
have to remember anything.”
Yes, no doubt that the memories created during
secondary school days are the best for me, but it does not mean that I never
faced any challenges in life. The one I mentioned is just part of the
challenges that I had face. Come to think of it, many of those challenges are
the best memories that I will never forget my whole life. It all goes down to
the mindset of how we get through things.
I may not face the challenges that
all of you faced, I am no psychologist as well, but I can surely say this. If
you have a problem, talk to somebody, talk to yourself in the mirror or cry in
the shower or in bed. Find a way to get through it, whatever it is, it all
helps. Do not give up halfway, be patience and wait for the miracle to happen.
Most importantly, maintain a strong mentality at all times and stay away from
all the suicidal thoughts that you come across. Do not fall into the trap of
the devil in you.
